June 2009
21 posts
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I Think The Guy Who Writes Fortune Cookies Wants... →
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jennyelizabeth:
ashleykidwell:
Oh that’s right. A Jwitz video =D
Lemme know what you think
If you guys have any fanmade Jwitz stuff; send it to me! (kidwell.ashley@gmail.com) and I’ll post it on here.
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The Perfect Mix CD by Jake Hurwitz
So you finally got the nerve to ask out that hot girl in your anthropology class - and when she turned you down you decided to settle for that weird girl who sits on the other side of you with the short haircut and the lisp. When you found out she was a lesbian you went back to your dorm to kill yourself; this is when you discovered that your roommate’s hot cousin was coming to visit. Now it’s on!...
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Tasteful Slang
jakehurwitz:
“Bobby’s new car is sick as fuck,” sounds like a pretty common statement from a young delinquent. I think I’m going to start integrating things like this into my regular life. Some quick examples:
- Did you see Meredith’s end table? Tasteful as fuck. - Just heard this great speach at my sister’s graduation. Moving as fuck. - God look at that rainbow. Beautiful as fuck.
Try...
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Another Day In the Life of... by Jake Hurwitz
Dear Diary, This is the worst day of my life. I know that’s how I’ve began each diary entry for the last 6 weeks but it’s true. Each day is worse than the last. I greet each morning with bitter disbelief that this is actually my life. I want to die. In my sleep, in a painful accident, I really don’t care. The sweet merciful hand of death is all I think about. I’ve...
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6th Grade, So What? A old Jake Vimeo find.
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Dear Ketchup Packet Industry... by Jake Hurwitz
Ketchup packets. They’re such a good idea. They’re quick, they’re easy, they’re very portable. You just grab five or six packets on your way out of any dining facility and you’re good to go. I do have one qualm here, however, as I sit here opening ketchup packet after ketchup packet as my chicken nuggets get cold. Honestly, just one thing, and anyone who knows me...
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A Conversation Between a Chef at a Cruelty Free...
Cow: So this is great, I love hearing about cruelty free restaurants. Chef: Yeah I really feel like I’m doing a good deed. Cow: Tell me about your menu. Chef: Well we have a great garden salad, a delicious flank steak. Cow: What? Chef: Flank steak, to die for. Cow: So when you say cruelty free… Chef: We kill all the animals very humanely. Cow: Ok maybe you don’t get it. To us...
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Wendell Blatt. Cuz He's So Fucking Chill. →